I'm happy to be sharing my ideas on snack offerings as part of a compensated campaign with Collective Bias® and NickMom. Although this is a sponsored post, all obsessions with healthy snacks and snarky opinions are entirely my own!
Ok, I need to tell you that if you read this post you are accepting the unwritten rules of the ‘parent code’ – and parent code says this is only between us grown-ups – you can NOT tell the kids.
Because if my kids ever really knew some of what I’m about to tell you, they would totally take advantage of it ALL THE TIME!
If Parenting isn't Funny, You're Doing It Wrong!
I know I’ve mentioned before that I’m a bit of a health nut. My kids say I'm a total health but since we just had s'mores this weekend, I beg to differ.
One of the most popular questions in our house is "Mom, what can I have for a snack?"
And of course, whatever I offer is always met with "Do we have anything else?" -- because the first thing I mention can NEVER be the 'correct' suggestion, can it?!
So when I saw this funny 'Snack Offering' graphic on the NickMom site it really hit home!
Hilarious, isn't it! Which is a great thing because if you're a parent, you need a sense of humor!
Parenting is funny -- not that planned out kind of funny but the "this is so embarassing, you have to laugh to get through it" kind of funny.
So I had to laugh out loud and at myself because yes, I can be a bit of a health nut and obsess about what snack options I'm offering my kids. If they would eat fruit all the time, that would be ideal -- but parenting is just not that easy, is it :)
After laughing and reading a few of these to my husband, I had three thoughts --
1. How the heck do you even pronounce 'Quinoa'?
2. Does everyone else's kids try to convince them that fruit snacks are heathly because the box says 'contains real fruit'?
3. Our go-to snack on Mondays is yogurt & a banana -- Heck yes, I'm coasting -- and darn proud of it!
I mean, come on, it's MONDAY! Who isn't coasting on Mondays?
Personally, I think they forgot a few snacks on this list so I’m happy to fill them in for you --
Snack: Homemade Oatmeal Cookies
What it says about me: In my house, coming home to fresh baked oatmeal cookies says ‘Mom’s a little overwhemled and needed to bake. She wants a comforting snack but does not want to feel guilty for eating 3 cookies before you get in the door’.
If I was baking for the kids, it would have been brownies or chocolate chip cookies or I would have at least tossed butterscotch chips in the oatmeal mix.
But oatmeal cookies are totally a selfish for-me treat, although anyone in the house is welcome to share :) So when the kids says "Yum! Mom, thanks for making us cookies!", I just give them a smile & a kiss (and eat another cookie with them).
I know what your thinking -- you would have gone with raisins in a snack mix. But we didn't have raisins so in a quick genius parenting-on-my-feet moment, I reminded the kids that raisins are just dried up grapes anyway.
Snack: 'Snack mix’ -- not the kind out of the bag but the one you make yourself
What it says about me: Here's the real deal with this -- if I offer snack mix as an option, it totally means I never got to the store this week and we have a small amount of these four items that can easily be tossed together into something edible and pulled off as a snack.
Yep, I totally admit it -- grocery shopping is not big on my list of ways I like to spend my free time, so if there's a way I can slide by without doing it for another day or two, I totally take the option!
Snack: A full Water Bottle
What it says about me: Anytime I hear "we're having a party today" or "celebrating a birthday at school", I already know what our snack will be - a full water bottle followed by a walk to burn off all the sugar that was consumed. As much as I love my kids, I'm not all that patient at dealing with the louder-than-elephants-bouncing-off-the-wall actions that are the result of all the party food.
ps. I am starting a petition that all school parties should be held early in the day so the kids can burn it off at recess -- let me know if you'd like to sign it too!
Oh, just to set the record straight --
No, I don't have a bento box.
Yes, I've served my kids protein bars for snacks.
And I don't think I would ever offer kale chips as a snack to ANYONE!
Once you get the kids to bed tonight, make sure to swing by the NickMom site and read 59 Ways You're SUCH a Mom too - #24, #43 & #54 are SO my house!
Even though I got a great laugh out of this, I'm still looking for a few good snack options --
somewhere in between "I'm desperate for these kids to like me" and "You think you're a better mom than most" would be great!
And if you have a recipe that includes quinoa, I'll give you bonus points!
Now, if you'll excuse me, it's a Monday so I need to grab a portable yogurt & banana so we can 'coast' to the car and off to our crazy activities for the day.